In the group

of women I work with – spanning the decades from late twenties to early sixties – it is noticeable that youth and beauty don’t dictate the happiest relationship, the kinkiest sex or the most wildly romantic love affair. In real life, so it is reflected on the internet (just with added loopiness). The facts are these: the vast majority of women have lives. They have careers, and marriages, and kids, and relationships, sometimes separately, and sometimes all at the same time, and sometimes with barren periods in-between. Most of them got the message that you can have it all, but you can’t have it all without negotiation and compromise because, you know, you can’t actually have anything without those provisos. Look around you; read a few blogs. Men, those devils, watch porn and, weirdly, still lust after women without pneumatic tits, fake tans and plastic sandals. They fall in love and lust with less than perfect female bodies, and are thrilled to bits to get their hands on all the bits women love to hate about themselves. Go out into the street and look at the people holding hands, feeling each other up and gazing passionately down each others cleavages: most of them aren’t world class beauties with gym-toned bodies, they are perfectly ordinary people hiding what someone else finds exceptional and arousing under not-next-season’s clothes and quite possibly a roll of flab. Here’s what women, and men, want: someone to turn them on and make them happy. Funnily enough, all this mainly goes on in the brain, which is why you don’t need botox and silicone to get laid, or loved.
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